Russell Wilson’s Contract Negotiations End!

After months of intense negotiations, Russell Wilson and the Seattle Seahawks have finally agreed to terms on a new contract. And this might just be the biggest contract in professional sports history.

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As part of Wilson’s new contract, he will be given 120 million yen, an electric razor, thirty bags of candy corn, five golden rings and a lifetime’s supply of Hubba Bubba Gum. These items will be dispersed over the next five years. In addition to those items, the city of Seattle will be renamed to Russell and Paul Allen, Seattle Seahawks owner, has agreed to rename the Seahawks to The Wilsons.

The former Seattle Seahawks, now Russell Wilsons held a press conference today in front of Centurylink Field with General Manager John Schneider and Russell Wilson to announce the contract signing.

“I’m so glad to have this opportunity to have not only a city named after me but a team too. Not many players get here. God made me for this. I hope to play for the Russell Wilsons for rest of my career. Go Wilsons!” Wilson said to on-site reporters.

“After Cam Newton’s new contract, I knew there was no way we could possibly pay Russ traditionally and keep this team together. I looked in the rulebook and there was nothing that said a man can’t be paid this way.” Schneider elaborated to the audience.

This could have a tremendous impact on the on-going negotiations between Andrew Luck and the Indianapolis Colts. Sources close to Andrew Luck say he may ask for the city to be named after him. This could be a good move for the Colts as nobody is really quite sure how to spell Indianapolis anyway.

In other Wilsons news, Michael Bennett is not expected to be back for training camp. He is holding out for a better contract. A source close to him says he wants more money and to have his beard be the logo for the Russell Wilsons.

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