Sony can’t win.

Sony announces female leads for new Ghostbusters reboot.

People are angry.

Sony announces they’ll have a male-focused reboot too.

People are angry.

No matter what Sony does with Ghostbusters, nobody is happy.

Except for Channing Tatum. He’s happy because he gets to star in a Ghostbusters movie. Congrats on being the only person happy, Mr. Tatum.

I was against any more Ghostbusters beyond a cartoon or comic book series. Ghostbusters is stupendous comedy film. It has aged great. Ghostbusters 2 was not up to par but it’s in the upper echelon of afternoon Comedy Central movies so it wasn’t a complete failure. With the death of Harold Ramis, Ghostbusters 3 is a depressing venture. It seemed best to let the franchise lie.

But money always makes a way. So here we are in 2015 with not one but two Ghostbusters reboots on the way. I’m going to refer to the female led version as Chickbusters and the male focused one as Dudebusters henceforth.

Chickbusters pissed me off initially because of Melissa McCarthy. Once it was announced, I knew she’d be in it and I’m not a fan of her style of comedy. I wouldn’t call it comedy even. The rest of the cast I’m not familiar with, maybe they can salvage that film. Paul Feig offers some encouragement. Anyone behind Freaks and Geeks is a person I can get behind. But Melissa McCarthy is a lot to overcome.

Now Dudebusters has the Russo Brothers directing. They directed Captain America: Winter Soldier and I thought that movie kicked a lot of ass. In fact it kicked the most ass of 2014. I’m neutral on Tatum. I don’t seek out movies with him in it, but I don’t hate him in movies he is in. He’s not a minus like Ms. McCarthy.

I’m making two sure bets about these movies. Neither will be better than the original Ghostbusters. And nobody will be happy with either of them after they’re released except for Channing Tatum.

What Sony should do is make an all-black version next called Ghostbustas with Busta Rhymes in the lead role. That’s where the real money is.

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