A Haunted Writer.

The writing process is a thing I see many people try to break down. Writer’s block seems to be an issue that many writers go through. Everyone has suggestions on how to get past writer’s block as if it were a problem. I wish I had writer’s block. It must be a blessing to not have something to say. It has to be a great feeling to come across a piece of paper and you can leave it blank. I can’t do that. I’m haunted by the ideas of my writing. The ideas I put down on paper float around in my head all day. These poltergeists just swim at the top of my brain waiting and sometimes begging me to be released. I just shoot them out in the form of words. The writing process for me is an exorcism. Sometimes I don’t do it well enough. The idea stays around because I didn’t do it well enough

I’ve got an endless supply of stories. I have so many stories and every once in a while one of them possesses me. I shoot it out with the hope it’ll be done. I shoot it out with the hope I’ve done it justice. I could write forever and forever. These stories never end. I could write a story about never ending stories. I walk past a tree and think “How did that tree get here? What did it experience? What has it gone through? That’d make a good story.” Whenever there is a comments section anywhere, I have to leave a comment otherwise what I wanted to say will haunt me. This happens with conversations too. Often times I find myself realizing what I should have said in a conversation  long after everyone else has forgotten it. Those things haunt me forever. There is no expelling them. I can try to bring up the conversation again but it’s never quite the same. It never goes away. Forever haunted.

I read my old blog posts on here and I could write all of those things over and over again. I read my old news stories and realize different angles I could have taken them. One story I’ve written has haunted me since college began. It started as a short story. Then a short screenplay. Now it’s becoming a novel which I hope to adapt to a long screenplay but no matter what format I pick, I can never get rid of it completely. I try to start other projects but it keeps possessing me. It wants to be gone. It wants to float into the world and be experienced at its best.

It’ll haunt me until I can give it what it wants.

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