That’s a Paddling.

We’ve all been bad little children at some point.  Maybe you peed your bed. Maybe you wrote with crayons on the wall. Maybe you ate the family goldfish.

You have to be taught right from wrong. You need to learn that there are consequences to your actions. But how?

Should parents be allowed to beat their kids? Should you be able to use physical force to teach your kid a lesson?

Nope. Nuh uh. No.

I can’t get behind this mentality. I can understand that people don’t believe children can be reasoned with so they need a physical stimulus.

I don’t agree with this.

You’re not allowed to hit another person. You’re not allowed to hit your wife, brother, mother, or any other family relative. No way in the United States is beating a sanctioned punishment for crime to my knowledge.

I don’t see why people think that even though they aren’t allowed to hit their peers that they can put their hands on confused, fragile beings such as children. When I was a child, I used to get spankings on the butt from my father and my mother. My mother would sometimes use a slipper. One time she used a belt. My father never used weapons. He believed it was wrong. He would pinch my skin and hit my back. One time he hit me in the face and immediately apologized.

I had to be younger than ten for the majority of these beatings. I used to be afraid of my father because of this. I once wanted the police to come and take him away.  He never used to hit me that hard even, but I’d still cry. My father had a rule that when hitting a child, if they run to their bed, you leave them alone. Otherwise they have no place to feel safe.

What a stupid rule. When I was a kid, every time I did something wrong, I feared when my father would hear about it. I panicked. My mother would say “Just wait till your father gets home.” That’s when I’d get it. He always got home around 9. I once got out of my deemed suitable punishment by going to sleep early.

The next time he woke me up. I’ve always resented both of my parents for this era of my life. I was helpless. I couldn’t protect myself from their deemed punishment.  Even when they were wrong. I once put a pencil in a water bottle as an experiment for my middle school science class. My father thought I was making a mess and decided hitting me was the best course of action. I quickly gathered my book and showed him with tears in my eyes what I was doing. He apologized and that was it.

As I grew older, I went to a martial arts school. They taught me self-defense. I remember the last time my father tried to hit me as a punishment. He went to raise his hand and I blocked it. “Not today.” That’s what went through my mind. He tried again and I blocked again. I wasn’t going to take it anymore. And it stopped. I wasn’t afraid anymore. My father resorted to yelling and taking away my video games, internet, laptop, action figures, and whatever else he could get his hands on.

My parents weren’t bad people. It was within their tradition to beat children when they did wrong. I know of other families where wooden spoons are used.

Did the punishment make me a better person? It’s debatable.

I don’t think an adult should ever put their hands on a child unless it’s to help them. I’ve babysat some bad little cousins of mine. I’ve never hit them as a punishment. My little three year old cousin, Joel would spit, bite, and do awful things, but I knew not to hit him. He’s a baby. He doesn’t know right from wrong. There’s better way to teach him not to spit. I don’t think children should be afraid of their parents. I only go to my parents for help when it’s an absolute last resort and I think it may stem from the era where I was afraid of them.

The older brother of the three year old, his name is Maxwell. He’s five. There was a party at his father’s apartment because a new baby had been born. I took the two of them to the nearby park to run around. As we took the elevator back, Max peed his pants. This was the worst possible time. I shook my head and told him we’d have to tell his dad.

His eyes shrunk back with fear.

“Don’t tell my daddy.” I could tell from his reaction, he was being spanked on the butt when he did things wrong.

The color was draining from his face. This is right?

No. It’s a barbaric practice that needs to stamped out.  Stop the pain.

I’ve noticed that whenever my mother spanked my little cousins on the butt, they would get up and spank her back. The only thing they picked up from each punishment was fear and to retaliate

There’s studies here and there about how this isn’t the best thing for children.

 

Here’s a great article that details it.

http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/discipline-behavior/spanking/10-reasons-not-hit-your-child

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